sometimes i feel like i'm walking around in a dreamlike slumber. i don't really think about anything, but i just look at things the way that i make it out to seem. you know? like if a picture's sorta fuzzy, you keep looking and looking, and then you start to form this image in your mind, but you're still not quite sure if that's what it is.. but you convince yourself that it must be what you think it is... in this state, i'm almost content. probably because i don't really do any thinking... but i'm almost happy. i let myself be fooled that things are the way that they seem... i don't look too deeply at the fuzzy images, and i go on thinking that it's something else. then i get jolted awake by a pain in my heart, when i realize that the image in my mind was all wrong..and i find it's not so great after all. it's even to the point of unbearable at times. but instead of learning and stayin awake and alert, i slip back into my slumber.. and it starts all over again...
but sometimes, i'll wake up to the sweetest moments. those are the best...i talked to an old friend today. made my day... those moments are nice.. it makes you forget the unpleasant ones for a moment and just be...